I’ve been feeling a little bit down lately. That’s life I guess, one day you feel great the next day, you feel crappy. May be it is just the hormones playing with my body and mind. I hope this crappy feeling won’t last for long.
I got myself a few DVDs to help ease my mind and thoughts. Last night I got to watch the DVD movie, The Break-Up starring Jennifer Aniston (Brooke) and her real life boyfriend Vince Vaughn (Gary). It’s about how a lived in couple goes through the critical stage of their relationship - the breaking up point. Brooke and Gary would fight like cats and dogs most of the time driving each other up the wall. There are several core reasons which contributed to their endless arguments and here is what I gathered from the movie:-
- Brooke’s perception of Gary
- Gary takes here for granted as he refuses to help her with the daily house chores.
- Brooke gives all the energy and strength to Gary ie. Clean the house, cook for him etc, she expects him to help as well.
- Brooke expects Gary to help without being asked. He should volunteer.
- Brooke expects Gary to do all those little things like picking up his dirty clothes and putting them in the laundry basket freely without being forced.
- Brooke feels that Gary should be sensitive to how she feels especially when she is also a working woman and at the same time having difficulties mending the house.
Conclusion:
Brookes just wants to be appreciated, cared and loved.
Gary’s perception of Brooke - Brooke is being too demanding, he feels he is trying his best to give her a better life.
- Gary thinks that Brooke loves cleaning and cooking for him.
- Gary thinks if Brooke needed his help she should tell him. How would he know?
- Gary thinks picking up his dirty clothes is just a trivial matter. He feels if he doesn’t feel like picking it up from the floor, just let it.
- Gary feels that Brooke should always tell him how she feels and never to assume that he knows how miserable she is.
Conclusion:
Gary feels that all those little things required by Brooke are not as important as working hard to give Brooke a better life. Hence that explains why he didn’t take Brooke’s requirements seriously.
It is definitely tough being in this particular situation. How much can a person take? Arguing, shouting and screaming with each other every single day? It can surely drain a person emotionally. Some might just talk things through, lower one’s expectations, compromise, go through changes and so forth. Or just live with the fact that the other person can never change.
While on the other hand, one party might just decide to walk out on the other. It depends on how much you are willing to give and take. Or how much can one settle for? I dunno, sometimes being in a relationship with the wrong person brings out the WORST in a person. It just happens. Nonetheless, it can also bring the BEST out of a person if he or she finds the suitable partner. I guess you just have to have some faith.
8 comments:
Dear... who dun want to be appreciated, cared and loved...
interesting ...
once, my daughters were complaining: 'why only us girls have to do the house?' ... since then, me and my wife started to rotate the house routines so works can be distributed.
hanif get tooooo absorbed in cooking. later he enrolled Kelas Sains Rumahtangga and emerged Best Cook in his school cooking competition. the problem is, we have to eat all his experimental recipes ... hahahahahaha.
nzn,
Yup, agree! All of us expects that :)
azer,
I would have to agree with your daughters on that! Way to go girls!!
As for Hanif, I think he got himself into a potential wonderful career path. By looks of it, he will make a great chef and in many years to come his future wife will be happy to have him cook for her..hehehhe...:)
Hahahha, you guys are lucky to be the first ones to eat his cooking..:P
Long time ago, I used to be my lil sis's tester for her sains rumahtangga cooking dishes..I enjoyed it so much..thank god no food poisonning!
last time i used to think that once you already choose to be with a person, you have to learn to tolerate and be understanding because no matter who you're with, no one is perfect. but after going thru a couple of rough experience, i thought, heck with all those. be confident about yourself and no settling for second best. everyone is selfish and you should be too because no one gives a fcuking care about how YOU feel.
hehe... emo sekejap... ;P
psst..can borrow dvd aa?? break-ups and patch ups..argghhh..
cookie,
that is so true, we have got to love ourselves more, it is not about being selfish, it is about appreciating ourselves. Life is never easy, kena jaga hati sendiri, to hell with what others think or feel and mnost importantly be happy with ourselves. We should not settle for less as we deserve the best!
Adorable,
Sure, anytime, just let me know I can pinjam u the DVD. As for the patching up part, hmmm you need to watch for yrself to know the conclusion.
I watched the movie too Nour..I thought the part at the bowling alley was too hard for Gary to handle and that Brooke went a bit too far there..
Sometimes, in a relationship, being stubborn does not help at all..the more you drag, the further away you go...
that's wat I think..
blackfeline,
I guess Brooke was too pushy, there are times I think she shld let it go..but naaa she keeps harping on it over and over and over again.
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